He Pushes You Away

By Barbara Christensen - 9:08 AM

He Pushes You Away

The Separation of Divine Love 

Walking away from a life burned to the ground is not without the darkest shadow work. 

"There comes a point where you no longer care if there's a light at the end of the tunnel or not. You're just sick of the tunnel." - Ranata Suzuki

She wants to be held, and he pushes her away. So she burns herself down, until nothing remains .... 

Into the shadows, pushed aside, locked up your heart behind your guise. He pushes you, a pause of self, but in the night in dreams he's felt. She cannot stay stagnant, and tries on the smile that hides a thousand teardrops behind the laughs. 

She trusts what you say, because she no longer trusts what she feels. You pushed her away, and her skin is raw from the river of sorrow.  Isis shines when you eyes meet, without your connection she reverses into the deep of this hollow world of masks and pretending. 

I love you. I really do love you. And I thank you for just being the best person you can for me. I really do love you even if you think my actions aren't saying what you want to hear. I know that it isn't me, but the confusion of what me/we is becomes too much. They say you shouldn't wait, and I have, because I really want to be with you. I know you love me so much, but I guess you can't allow that to be outside of dreams. So I walk into the spaces inside of myself to feel you, and move forward outside of myself to heal. Walking away from a life burned to the ground for the one desire to be fulfilled,  love. 

My heart is broken

I know it looks like I am pulling my heart together with a bandaid, but it is actually a razorblade that is ever cutting me deeper. I ache, and fake, and forsake my heart hoping that by deserting the space that is the darkest void will bring me life into my longest death of missing you. 

Hope is eternal, you know. I hope the dreams find a way into reality one day. For every moment will be like walking on broken glass going forward. The trail of blood leads back to you. 

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