I wrote in the first chapter of "The Awakened Heart" about eye gazing. "Eye gazing is intimacy without having to say anything at all. If you want to be aroused, it starts with the eyes." 

I also have written about the way we can fall in love without ever touching. Divine Feminine and Divine Masculine this is so important to note: "We now know that especially for a woman, when they have done brain mapping during visual stimulation, she feels this sensory connection without a single touch. .... When she thinks about this soul that has sparked her heart and soul, the visual memory and the mind’s eye are constructing a world that is as real to her as the reality you see in front of you right now. They are using semantic memories to reconstruct past experiences or visual memories and this modulates a new memory. " 

By looking at your image, by hearing your voice, by reading your text, there is a whole dimension that has been created. It only takes one falsehood to crack that newly created reality on its axis where you no longer know what is up and what is down. When your partner has trauma, that shift will either lead to them shutting down (runner) or rushing in (chasing). This is the quintessential dynamic that we often talk about in tarot readings. Understanding this is so essential because they aren't running from you, they are running to you no matter how it looks. Either running back into that fantasy world created in their energetic mind or running towards that which will make their stories feel more real. 

Only when the fear is no longer felt will the runner/chaser dynamic end, and the true relationship building begins.