She's Going To Take A Minute

By Barbara Christensen - 4:54 PM

 

She's Going To Take A Minute

When you meet someone who's been treated so badly, it is going to take them a minute to heal. It's going to bring you pain to be the first one to ever treat her right,  but in that growth you will find the most tender love you've ever experienced. 

The abuse she experienced can make her hypervigilant and fearful of getting hurt again. She might be worried about trusting someone new or get cold feet recognizing any red flags. 

The past has eroded her self-esteem. She questions her own judgment and wonders if  you truly care. 

The emotional pain from the abuse can take time to heal. She is likely dealing with lingering feelings of sadness, anger, or betrayal, making it hard to feel open and vulnerable with someone new, but that doesn't mean she doesn't want love. 

It's just that manipulative behavior has warped her understanding of healthy relationships. She is unsure of what real love looks and feels like, and often would rather hurt herself than risk the hurt her heart says she may feel if you pull away, or just don't care. 

There are deep wounds of abandonment and avoidance that she may not even be aware of, and if she is, it takes time for the wounds to be healed. 

You may have to learn to recognize some of the cues that she is pulling away, as she may shut down emotionally when you're really invested.  She may need you to remind her that you are here with her. You may have to touch her gently to make sure she is aware if you being near before initiating a cuddle. 

Healing together can create something beautiful. She is loveable, and loving, and requires just a bit of patience. 




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